Close Doesn't Hurt

Kyle Farnsworth’s near-killing of Manny Ramirez last night was probably intended to be a brushback pitch but, typical of Kyle, it was nowhere close.

Of course, more is already being made of this than necessary. For the life of me, I will never understand why “purpose pitches” are treated as such an indignity by teams. The “how dare you?” attitude reared its ugly head again last night, with Josh Beckett putting on his best “I’m not angry, I’m just disappointed” face, and Terry Francona looking like someone just punched his dog, after Farnsworth’s behind-the-head fastball to Manny.

I will now speak directly to the Red Sox and their “Nation”: Stop it! Use some logic! Do you think that Kyle Farnsworth was trying to hit Manny Ramirez in the head? For the love of all that is holy, he was doing (well, trying to do) what any pitcher should do…taking back the inside part of the plate! Ramirez has been lounging in the box for five straight games against the Yankees. Mussina, not surprisingly, refused to work him inside, leaving the half-retarded ogre to live off of the center, and outside corner, of the plate. The result: 6-9 in the series and 2 mammoth shots last night, alone. The buzz pitch makes him (gasp!) uncomfortable and unsure of what pitch selection he will see and, thus, less likely to single-handedly break the spirit of the pitching staff.

But, sure, go ahead and plan your retaliation. Who gives a shit about strategy and gamesmanship? It’s only your profession.

I speak again to our loyal readership (so, Maas and my father): To the credit of both Farnsworth and Ramirez, their remarks after the game were exactly on-point. When asked if the pitch had a purpose, Farnworth responded, “It just slipped. I was trying to be aggressive and go in on him, but the ball slipped on me.” He also added, “Any hitter, you gotta show him inside ore they’ll be sitting over the plate and wear everybody out.”

Hmm. Concise. Sensible. Thanks, Kyle.

Ramirez was asked if he was upset, to which he responded, “Not really. I like to compete. I like that challenge. It’s part of the competition.”

Hmmmm. Even more concise. Even more sensible. Complete sentences? Thanks, Manny!

So, the two men involved both say, essentially, “That’s the game. That’s the way it’s played. No problem.” Everything must be cool, then.

But, somewhere in the shadows, Josh Beckett is still shaking his head in disgust.

Somebody get Jeter a reinforced helmet.